Why his erection goes limp during sexual encounter for sexual orgasm

Reader: 3/29/2002>
i am 27 years old. I hav normally been really sexually active, and really hard when having sex, up until about 3 years ago. i recently got out of a 5 year relationship, and was fine then. ive met someone else, now,(2 yrs after the last one ended) and was , masterbating alot between then and now. my "friend" whom i care avout profusely, had unconsentual sex with her ex, but has had only 2 boy-friends. i am the third. when we decided to have sex, i vould get it "up", but if i tried to "keep" it up, it would go down faster than a brick falling the length of the empire state building. well, weve tried two more times,(she almost dumped me,) but i told her i would wait as long as it took to get through this.(by the way..when i put the condom on all three times, it shrunk, the third time it came off half way! and i shrunk 3.5 to 4 o'clock position.) well, this last time was alot better, i got really hard, before i get on the bed, and she's also giving me a hand job (progress) but when i hit the bed (10min.) it started going down.???
i get hard when i sit on my butt, or in the shower, and when i watch videos. a rubber band alo helps. but i want to get the thing up, and stay up, using her as a "visual"!! not some rubber-band or video!
help! should we try sitting down and doing it? (by the way she's really tight, from not having alot of intercourse) this has some effect on the blood from the tip of it forcing it back to the body, right?
i care for her alot, she's been patient with me,(although not in a hurry, as am i ) yes, please, help!
-ste....

Dr. Lin: 3/31/2002>Your autonomous nervous system is switched to the sympathetic mode for "Fight or Flight" , where "Fight" is premature ejaculation and "Flight" is erection withdrawal, due to the stress produced by sexual encounter. Sexual encounter or intercourse can fire up stress neurohormone adrenalin production.
You can not perform without powering the parasympathetic nervous system for increasing the nitric oxide production in the neuro-muscular endings of the penile arterial wall and blocking the stress hormone alpha-2 receptors in the penile arteries for penile arterial dilation, even if you have sufficient testosterone to burn!
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